Look at these photos closely. Look at the chin. If you let your eyes relax and try not to be distracted by my disco ball cheekbones, you might notice that under an expertly applied layer of blemish remedy concealer there are most definitely pimples on my chin.
There's one older one that's slowly healing but reflects light winsomely on my chin, and another that protrudes just slightly on the curve of my chin. And I think that they only add to the youthful, adorable, frosted donut of health look I work so hard to cultivate.
I could have easily made them disappear from these photos. One finger swipe on my facetune and those suckers are gone. But I realized recently that a zit or two straight up makes me look younger. And I like it.
Think about who gets pimples. Young, adorable teenagers. Fertile glowing little balls of out of control hormones. Babies get tons of little skin things. If I were to say the word pimple during one of those word response quizzes it would be impossible not to think of something having to do with the early years of our lives. A spot or two is nothing if not a sign of youth.
Now don't get me wrong. I don't want acne. When my chin is covered with a veritable constellation of red, throbbing, painful cysts I am crying on the phone to my dermatologist to fix me immediately. Acne is a disease, and it should be cured. A lot of pimples, that don't go away and are painful, is a sure sign of imbalance. You should do what you need to do to heal yourself. For me, it's one of the worst side effects of the treatments I use to control my cancer, which basically involve filling my body with poison. That's not what I'm talking about here.
But that one pimple you get every month before your period? That's basically a sign that your body is working the way it's supposed to. It's a sign that your juicy skin is so fertile and youthful that it might have gone a little overboard producing the thing that we then spend a small fortune on moisturizer to reproduce.
One pimple is not the end of the world. In fact, could it be possible it's a good thing?
Ever since I started on the lupron (forcing me into chemically induced menopause) I've been struggling with serious, painful acne. Viewed through the lense of how bad things are now, I just feel stupid and ungrateful for how hard I was on myself then. I would kill to go back to the time when I got one cute, slightly annoying zit per month.
In fact, if I let go of this insane beauty standard that has taught me pores should be reviled and all humans should be lit by the Valencia filter at all times, and I think about my own opinion - I sincerely, truly and actually think it's cute. Why are we so damn hard on ourselves?**
**Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not trashing my concealer. For one thing it's got tea tree oil in it, so it's basically healing. Also, it keeps my disgusting fingers from picking all day - I'm the worst at this. But I don't do it because I need it. It's optional. I have gone completely cold turkey on wearing makeup to workout (trust that it only makes things worse) because it feels like the healthiest choice for my skin when my pores open up and I'm sweating. I feel good about decisions that I make that feel based on the health and balance of my body.