Every year, there is a hat. It is a special hat. Less headwear and more a subliminal totem that you are that kind of girl. The one other people should pay attention to. Now they call her an influencer, but back then we just called her "popular." The people so on the edge of the wave it seems they made the trend. The truth is they didn't. They were just amongst the first ones - by strategy or by instinct - to absorb whatever waves the universe was emitting towards that thing. And I am so proud of myself because it is becoming easier and easier for me to identify it.

Let me demonstrate.

There are a few key tastemakers who will start sporting it (Kendall,  Bella, basically anyone photographed as  French street style  during PFW.) Most normal people don't track them like the ticker on the NY Stock Exchange. But I do. And I know what will come next.

The bloggers will pick it up. The big ones. The ones whose blogs have a really clever name. The ones who also developed such loyalty and prescience that they have - in their own right - earned first name recognition status. (As of now, this year's style has already seen several times on Aimee.)

And if you're not paying attention, then it will suddenly be everywhere. My sweet friends - this is the reason I learned the word ubiquitous.

"YASSS, I am so glad I listened to Dena," you will say, silently, in your own head.  But maybe, at the beginning, you felt confused. You saw them at Urban Outfitters or Zara. "Ugh, not again." You might think. Or "it feels like these were just a total don't!" I give to you this parlance of the time lest you should know the line between do's and don'ts in fashion is an ephemeral and gossip string. One need only watch the Lifetime drama, "Birkenstocks: ouroboros" a true tale of how love can wax and wane and wax again for a humble sandal. This might be the exact words you think to yourself, or maybe you don't care at all.

I hope for myself to be the latter. But I am so far gone, so beyond redemption in the quest to not care what people think of me, I feel like I have no legs to stand on here. So let us be trend stalkers. Slightly earlier ones, but early enough to wear off-the-shoulder went it felt fresh, and to have paper thin t-shirts we are now repeating the second time around as trends cycle. Chokers forever.

Let's go back to the HMs and Zaras. They don't get credit, they are just trend spotters also.  They saw it on the tastemakers, the bloggers, and the runways and said: "Knock them off." Or whatever they say. But if you're lucky (or early enough, like now) you could be someone who benefits from noticing these patterns, too. You can be the one everyone thinks is a tastemaker, instead of a style stalker. The real secret here is everyone is just stalking everyone else. Bloggers stalk Fashion houses, who turn around and stalk middle America to bring us normcore, and now menocore (that's middle-aged women style for those of you wondering.)

There is another incentive for surviving this rant. If you don't wait till they are sold out, and everyone is jacking up prices, and the really cheap knockoffs don't look quite right. If you buy and start wearing one of these two styles now, if you put your Trust me and my curation/prediction skills and get one and start wearing it ASAP, you will be the tastemaker. Nobody has to know you get it from me. Or the original progenitor - "Of course, I know they are all referencing the iconic Kate Moss Photo.) Or "Oh, I've always been a bit of a francophile/beatnik. Have you read any Kerouac, his stuff is sooo sexy. American Boheme was no slouch despite their obsession with Bardot and all the other French ingenues. Can you blame them with what the US had on offer?" Or something like that. You be you.

Anyways,

I'm calling it this year for the Greek Fisherman Hat, and the Beret. My best prediction is that everyone got into all those videos of everyone they ever met frollicking in Greece this year, and this hat became a beloved touchstone. "Oh, did you summer in Greece, to?" you're saying. I know, how great has it been since the dollar has been so strong. Remember when we took all those pictures on boats in bathing suits? Did you break the plates? We broke so many plates."

The Beret, in contrast, is just the next logical projection in everyone else, including moi, being relentlessly obsessed with french girl beauty. French pharma. French women. French fashion houses. Last year for me was the year of "What would Sabina Socol wear?" and "What would Violette say about this eye lewk?"


Pictured above is a  "real" Fisherman's from Greece.  I got it on Amazon. Here it is on ASOS ($26) and ShopBop ranges from a $47 (really nice one!) up to Eugenia Kim ($245) that's almost sold out! There's only one left. It's happening. 

Your beret must be a certain kind of beret. It must be soft. It must be shaped just so. The little nubbin on the top must be perfectly erect - not too short to be a button, not too long so that it droops. It should be balance on the head with undefinable j'ne'se'quois. It should, above all, not be costumey. Reformation has a great one for $17 made in France from recycled material,  and also a leather one that definitely offers up an omage  to Dior's take (that would be black, and in leather. ) Dior's version is more money than I can even imagine. The price isn't even listed on the website.  F21 also has a vegan version for under $15, but I haven't seen it in person so can't vouch for it's quality. Gucci also has one for about $410 in s gorgeous red. There is a leather beret for everyone.

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In addition to hats being adorable, and making literally anything into an "outfit", the best thing about hats is the sun or cold protection factor. In the summer everyone is just so much better about hats and sunscreen. I personally think we spend just as much time outside in the Fall.

Since it's not as hot in the fall we tend to eschew hats - or at least I do. But knowing, against my shame and regret, that I absolutely should be wearing my own portable shade all year long.

Sartorial points provide instant gratification. Someday I will be able to motivate myself more with good intentions, because I know myself well enough that the impact of the amorphous long term benefits of sunscreen is not enough to keep me constantly on track.

The beret is sans brim, and does not provide sun protection. However, if my mother is to believed, it will save me from freezing to death. I could be buck arsed naked, but if I have a hat on I should be fine. Bonus points if it's a leather beret, maman?

I also believe this to be absolutely the truth and yet I still don't  always wear a hat when it's cold because it flattens my hair. "Pneumonia vs. flat hair, she picks the lung infection." Shh, if you're quite you can hear that carrying on the wind from every jewish mother in the US.

So maybe the beret will be my "Winter" hat. I can work with the little seam, but unlike a stalking cap, it wont leave my head shaped like a mushroom from smurfville.

Don't worry, pictures of me in a beret coming soon.